The Dark Passenger

After reading this article, it made me feel very nostalgic, and a little more self-aware than I appreciated, but in the end, I grew as a person.

I'm trying to think of other additions. In particular,

- I think always being visible is a big one. Your host must not, ever, think that he has the place to himself, or else he will remember what that felt like and insist on having it back.

- I think, also, always being smelt should go along with this. You need to be as familiar as possible in another man's home, and that includes changing the aroma of the residence. Destroy all semblance of the previous ways.

- Being heard is a toss-up. It certainly helps fight the loneliness for your host, having a warm, jovial voice echoing through the halls, but snoring all through the night isn't going to endear yourself to an extended stay.

- One grand gesture a week, preferably at the lowest point in the relationship, is a great way to buy yourself some more time. Do the dishes, take out the trash, let your host have the remote for once, maybe save that last little bit of booze instead of using it as mouthwash. It's the out of the ordinary stuff that will remind your host of why he thought it would be a good idea to have you there in the first place.

Damn Monkeys

This could be a great way for the disease to spread and turn everyone into ghost pirates.




Monkeys infecting everyone - just like in Outbreak. It's too bad they already made a Planet of the Apes prequel, because this is how it's really going to happen.

What does DutchMasters look like

Don't Cage me Bro

You know someone doesn't have a job when the blog is poppin off.


Ever since watching Con Air in Tahoe last month, I've really been getting soft on old Nic Cage again. He really is the man- there is no other actor quite like him. And in the long, cold days of Channing Tatum, the nerd from Avatar, and Spiderman reboots, that is much needed.

I first saw this clip, and almost cried.


But when you get to see something like this, it wipes the tears away, only to dump a bucket more on you.



Thanks, NIC!

Possible back story for the Life Caddy

http://news.yahoo.com/mountain-man-scares-owners-remote-utah-cabins-090722480.html


Or the Liftie, the launchie, the Cousins go into the woods to hunt him and get the bounty to break even in Vegas

Drunk and Drunker

Maybe that opening scene feels like it's going to be a flashforward of the ending of the movie, but then it turns out it flashing forward to 30 minutes into the movie.

Then they wake up from their hangovers and they're in the middle of the desert, but they figure that it's totally hopeless, so they decide to start a new life right there, when civilization is literally just down the road. They just view it as a sign that this is what happens when you party too hard in Vegas. Grandpappy told them a story about how he and Proctie partied too hard in Vegas, and they ended up on a spirit walk in the desert, which is what turned his life around. Of course, at some point they'll find Proctie's Log, detailing the trip that they decide to reenact.

oh and

I like the name Land Shark- I think that's appropriate. But quit stealing my ideas about jumping into the water to avoid the shark.

I think the guy with the beanie should still be shirtless in boardshorts- just wearing the beanie on the beach like kids wear them at the bar in Tahoe.

I gotta go watch Jaws again, and Deep Blue Sea, and ... Megashark? other shark movies to build up some good ammo.

I think the gag works better if maybe after they're under the water, one of them runs out of air and has to pop his head up, and then he goes below the surface and his head is gone. I'm imagining that these guys construct a crazy snorkeling rig to traverse underwater.

SSS

I'm not sure what I'm dreaming of- probably just a good excuse to grow out the beard again. Today, though, I realized the power of the three SSS's. Much like GTL, but I feel like it's pregaming for GTL.

Shit
Shower
Shave

And then the fourth S, Shot.

It's amazing how much better you can feel about anything once you take care of the necessities. I think I like the woods, the desert, because they are known unknowns. The bottom of the ocean is sweet, but I can't get there, and i can't live there. But out in the woods, anything can happen, and sometimes it's happening right in your own backyard. Just going on a good hike makes you feel like a man.

Maybe it's that feeling of responsibility about wilderness that I'm responding to. Maybe it's about getting in touch with your ancestors. Or maybe it's about fighting some wolves with broken beer bottles.

Drunk: The Hangover Prequel

The three boys in Vegas should be the intro scene. Three cousins, who clearly hate eachother at this point and time, putting up their large inheritance on a single hand of blackjack. One should win, the other should lose and the last (sammy?) should double down and lose double his investment, maybe ending up in debt which would lead to a move to the woods. However, im a little concerned, all your ideas recently have involved moving into the woods. Are you dreaming of Vermont?

Shark Week the movie

So is this movie about a group of shark hunters, searching for the rarest of all, the land shark? Maybe we only get flashes of the tail, a few mauled seals, maybe a couple amputees until the final confrontation. I would like to see some Jaws parallels, like a bearded guy in a beanie and an old man teamed up with a scientist. What would be funny is that the only place to hide from this shark would be in the water. Instead of the Jaws-style, everyone running out of the water; You have everyone run into the water while the shark chases. "Shark! Quick! Everyone into the water!"

Shark Week: The Movie

I'd like to make a trailer for this over the summer using your shark. I think also a movie trailer could make a great music video.

Shots I have in mind:
Camera underwater looking for shark, and then the camera pops up out of the water, and the shark slowly creeps by.
Maybe another underwater shot, where we see the body of the swimmer, and then we go up, and their head has been bitten off!
Hero doing the Baywatch slo-mo run, but my camera doesn't have a slo mo feature, so they'll have to pretend
Someone playing drums on the beach- with a real drum kit.
Setting those Chinese lanterns into the sky, which is what awakens the mighty Shark.
And course, a lot of scenes where sexy girls are screaming and everyone's jumping into the water to escape "Get into the ocean!"

Blowing granpappy's inheritance in Vegas

I was watching a TV show yesterday about Zion National Park, which is about two hours east of Vegas, and I thought it could be a really cool destination.

I think the three boys should all go to Vegas- each with different reasons
Sammy has always watched the Vegas movies
Billy had the gateway girl get him addicted to that world
Bennett's in town for a medical convention

There can definitely be that conflict between the groups. Two of them together is okay, but it never works out when the three of them get together.

Then they decide to gamble the inheritance- whether they win or lose, I don't know.

But really what I'm more interested in then, is that the three guys decide to go to Zion and live in a National Park. Really cut loose. I like that idea of the first 30 minutes taking place in Vegas, and the last hour being in total nature.

What happens in Zion? Maybe one of them dies, maybe something worse, or maybe they find each other and become very spiritually fulfilled.

But the idea of building something out of nothing (Vegas) and then doing the opposite of that (gambling) and taking that philosophy into the wilderness and seeing what happens. 127 Hours maybe, or Alive, or The Grey, or Wanderlust and they meet a bunch of hippies.

I think the gambling is the impetus, not the climax. I think you're right- it feels better. When you have nothing, then you can really start over. And some people go to Vegas to get everything, and others go to get rid of everything.

Ritz at the Ritz

Sammy the Engineer

BL Bloody Mary

Then just some drunk kids

Crackers in Vegas

These first two were damn expensive.

This one wasn't cheap either.

That right there is priceless.

Upward and Onward

And now, for some thoughts on the Super Bowl...



ZooMass represent

Safety!


I don't think I want to live in a world where Battleship the Movie exists.


I feel similarly about GI Joe 2, although, it looks like how GI Joe 1 should have been.


What's up David Beckham? You've just ruined Superbowl commercials forever.


Chevy Sonic is everything I hate about modern cars.


Leave it to Star Wars to keep selling the prequels by using clips of the only good Star Wars movies.


Buy flowers, get butt sex. With girls.


I'm only interested in watching The Avengers to see a good Hulk movie for once.


Tom Brady might be the only guy who can just be perfect when he needs to be.


Why do half-time shows have to suck so much? I hope you all are taking a really long piss right now.


Although some of Madonna's dancers are nuts, like the dude with rubber knee.


At least LMFAO decided to prove that all their songs are the same, and that they're all also the same as old Madonna songs.


More dubstep please.


Why is it that I know it's Cee Lo just by seeing a big fat black dude marching on the stage?


It's just like Vanilla Ice said about banging Madonna, "There ain't fireworks shooting out of her pussy." But there sure is a lot of smoke when you drop her in a dirty hole.


Clint Eastwood is old.


Eh, let's set a few more Super Bowl records. Go pats... That's the face right there. You know which one I'm talking about. Looks like he's about ready to do the no pants dance.


The second half is how I figured the first half would start. Although I do not know what that Hernandez TD dance was all about.


I hate Fiats, but that commercial reminds me a lot of my life.


Is bacon a girl?


I also remember The Darkness.


This is that part of the game where you don't say anything.






Oh snap, Bob's Burgers is on.



I'm only drinking Bud Light Platinums in Las Vegas.